Going the distance

You know that feature on Facebook that shows you the posts you've made on that exact day during the previous years? 

Here's my memories from this day:

It was my second day at my old-new job and there was going to be a party. Elina introduced me to someone: "Auri, this is Lauri - Lauri, this is Auri". Thank goodness she did!

A week later: "I'm ready to change my relationship status if you are". :)

I don't think I could have done it if it wasn't for L jumping first!

One of the most beautiful quotes I know.

I was so excited about dating a guitarist and kept bugging him to play me something. Being that his thing was mostly melodic death metal, he said he didn't know that many pop songs. Then he played this to me. It's been our song ever since.

Ha, I think this was when I had gotten in a fight with L, who didn't want to do anything special for our anniversary. Being upset, I arranged a really nice day for myself with Siri and Katarina! 

L told me afterwards that he almost didn't go to the party, because he was very tired. Fate?

The roses withered and the bonsai didn't survive the Finnish winter... But you can always buy more roses and another bonsai!

I had gotten a gift certificate from Babo, Marcus & Johan and we celebrated the anniversary by having Ethiopian for the first time.

This year, on our 7th anniversary, I am in Kenya preparing for a birthday party I'm organizing, and L is at work back home in Helsinki, and maybe going to see a movie later today.

Every day since I came here, I've missed him and almost weekly I have had the urge to go back home. However, this internship is an excellent opportunity for me and L has been nothing but supportive. I've met people here who've had to choose between a relationship and pursuing their dreams. I know also some people who would never dream of going, because the long-distance is too scary. Sure, I've been worried at times, but L has been like a rock. "You go, you do what you need to do for six months. Internet works, phones work, planes fly. And then you come back." His calmness makes this journey so much smoother. It is exactly like Sheryl Sandberg says: A successful woman needs someone like that beside her - someone who is an equal life partner and supports them in their careers. Thank you L for being that to me.

But... the distance can be difficult. Luckily I found an amazing idea on Pinterest. It was posted by a woman, who was going to go abroad for 6 months. She wrote letters for her boyfriend to open while she was away. I started preparing the letters for L in November and by the time I gave him the box of envelopes at the end of January, there were 24 of them! Making them was a lot of fun and I think it helped me process the thought of going far away.

You can come up with almost anything for these "Open when"/"Avaa kun"-letters. I made one for events like Valentine's day, his birthday, our anniversary but also public holidays like Labor day (which was filled with snacks I know he wants the "day after" :P)

For many of the letters the envelope only had a clue in it, to direct L to find something in our home. The Valentine's Day present was stashed in the footstool in our living room. When I've told about this idea to my friends, many have commented: "What if he searches the whole house after that to find all the things you hid there" Ah, but they don't know my L. His self-control is off the charts. He hasn't even opened half of the letters yet, and there's only 8 weeks left! 

All kinds of presents and gifts can be put in the envelopes, not only poems and love letters (which might not be in the receiver's cup of tea). I think it's important to try to think: What would your partner appreciate? as opposed to: What would I want?
 This was "Open when you don't know what to do in the weekend" and contained a couple of movie tickets.

This was so far the hardest clue. It was "Open when you can't think of anything proper to cook" and in the end he found the two cookbooks we have in our kitchen and bookshelf. I had chosen a few recipes and labeled them with post-its. This was induced by my worry of him only eating noodles and sandwiches while I'm away - a worry since then deemed unnecessary.

There are still plenty of fun envelopes to open and these are examples on what L has opened already. If you're reading this and you know some of the letters I've made, please, don't spoil! :)

I'll Skype with L after he gets off work and then he'll open the one labeled: Open when it's our anniversary. I stashed it in our house just in case he wasn't able to come to Kenya for this day. I'm happy I did. :) 

Hyvää vuosipäivää, L. Kohta mä tuun kotiin.